


Until Today

by icandrawamoth



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars: Rebels
Genre: Established Relationship, Hurt/Comfort, Loss of Innocence, M/M, Vomiting, War
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-02-15
Updated: 2018-02-15
Packaged: 2019-03-19 01:14:45
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 579
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13693821
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/icandrawamoth/pseuds/icandrawamoth
Summary: "It's different on the ground than when you're in a fighter," Wedge finds himself saying quietly after awhile. "Up in the sky, you don't really see people dying. There's no blood-""And there's no screaming," Hobbie adds, voice hollow.Or, two kids look war in the face for the first time.





	Until Today

With his hand on Hobbie's back, Wedge can feel the way his muscles spasm as he heaves. The acrid smell of vomit burns his nostrils, but Wedge doesn't move away. If he can be here, trying to offer comfort, he can delay having to process himself what they've just seen.

"I-I'm sorry," Hobbie says shakily as he straightens. "I never imagined..." His voice trails off, and Wedge meets his gaze, knowing the shock in his wide blue eyes is echoed in his own.

"Me either." Wedge's voice is low and rough, like his own throat has been as just as abused. He squeezes his eyes closed, wishes it didn't just make the image clearer. He tries to concentrate on Hobbie's ragged breathing, the sound of the nearby river. He doesn't imagine he can still hear the screams of the dying and the cries of mourners on the battlefield just out of view up a low rise behind them.

Hobbie is clutching his hand, and Wedge looks at him again. "This is what we signed up for?"

Wedge makes himself nod. "If we weren't here, we would've been on the other side." He swallows thickly. "We could've _done_ this."

Hobbie shakes his head violently. "Never. I would've refused that order. These people never did anything but sell the Alliance some grain!"

"I know, Hobbie. I would've refused, too, but imagine where we'd be then." He squeezes his boyfriend's hand, trying to convey a reassurance he doesn't quite feel. "But we're here to help, to clean up after the Empire. That's what we do now." The words sound so hollow and useless. What can the two of them or Phoenix Squadron or the entire Rebellion do for this place, for these people whose lives have already been destroyed?

"Yeah." Hobbie wipes his mouth on the sleeve of his flight suit, runs a trembling hand over his face. "Yeah."

"Here." Wedge unclips his canteen from his belt and offers it. "This might help."

"Thanks." Hobbie drinks, then just stands there staring for long moments, taking deep breaths. Wedge lays a hand on him again and tries to copy the calming action.

"It's different on the ground than when you're in a fighter," Wedge finds himself saying quietly after awhile. "Up in the sky, you don't really see people dying. There's no blood-"

"And there's no screaming," Hobbie adds, voice hollow.

Instinct takes hold as Wedge wraps an arm tight around him. "I don't think I really understood war until today."

"Me either."

It's ugly and awful, Wedge thinks. Of course he knew that. He knew people were being killed; he knew the Empire was doing terrible things. Yet he'd never seen it on the ground like this, right in front of his eyes. The thought that this is happening on so many worlds across the galaxy is overwhelming. Can the fledging Rebel Alliance really be doing much to help?

But he knows that kind of thinking leads to defeat. If Wedge can offer a bacta patch to one person or help one lost child find a living relative, that's worth it. It makes a difference. It has to.

Suddenly, Hera's voice rings out from above them. "Wedge, Hobbie, I need you guys back up here."

"Coming!" Wedge takes his canteen back and returns it to his belt, pats Hobbie's back one more time. "You ready?"

"No," Hobbie answers honesty, but he takes Wedge's hand again anyway, and together they return to work.


End file.
